Forced Entries
by Chocobo Watcher
Summary: Bit of silly drabble inspired by events in FF7: Crisis Core, AngSephZack. No sex, rated M for inferences only, otherwise clean. One-shot for now, but could see more if the game inspires further.


Disclaimer: I don't own any characters, Squeenix does. Not meant to resemble anyone living or dead as perceived by Nomura and Company. These are bits of drabble that came to me as I was playing Crisis Core, watch OUT! XD

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_**The following diary entries are pages ripped from expurgated texts. Legend has it that they were found under a former Shinra company compost pile by an anonymous journalist. The author takes no responsibility for authenticity or accuracy. **_

**Sephiroth**

Angeal has accused me of possibly tampering with the holograms in the second floor training room. Apparently Cadet Fair encountered _moi_ during a routine training mission and managed to break his sword. Angeal has to know that is something Hojo probably did, or failing that, Genesis. He said that he was just covering all the angles because the damn thing can't reprogram **itself. **If you ask me , we're lucky the puppy hasn't broken his neck falling off in the Junon Canon simulation. So now to get in there we have to enter 5 security codes instead of .

xxxx

Angeal has done it this time. I went to try and talk Genesis out of his plan. I put up with **days** of his quoting that damnable Loveless operatic. _I was risking my career here, people._ Of course everything is a shambles because no one else around here has **any discipline. ** And what is the first thing out of Mister Honorableness mouth upon my return? Not " What did Genesis have to say? " or "Are we totally screwed", but " Have you lost a little weight? Have you been eating properly?" Granted, a large hole **had** been blown in the side of the building, and we **were** under attack. But _g__ood fucking Gaia, man,_ I'm out trying to save our best friend from himself and all you care about is my weight?! I've taken my phone off the hook and barricaded the apartment into oblivion. I just hope to the goddess the building doesn't explode in my sleep now that the president is safe.

xxxxx

I refused a mission to go and talk my friends into coming back. Let's face it- if Angeal wants to go and join Genesis, it's his funeral. I tried. Genesis is hopeless _**and **_obsessed. I understand they've sent Cadet Fair as a replacement. I wonder what would happen if somehow I were to fail? He'd sure better not.

xxxx

**Angeal**

Cadet Fair has **no focus whatsoever**, which has earned him the epithet "The Puppy" in our little triad.

I must admit, the boy is handsome in a strapping, rosy-cheeked way. And we are all getting sick to death of his constantly enthusiastic battle exclamations. I swear if I hear him chirping "Go, go, **GO**!"

or "I'm feeling it!" one more time some days ..... Where does Shinra **get** recruits like him anyway? Oh yes. Gongaga. He's a country boy like me. I had forgotten.

xxxxxx

I need to come up with another method to discipline the puppy. He's become so adept at sword polishing he finishes in record time! Apparently my lectures on wear, tear and rust have gone to the heart of the boy. Perhaps I should introduce him to some new techniques. Or perhaps an all nighter involving "interrogation". :). Perhaps that will slow him down. Or at least get him to pay better attention.

**Zack**

Director Lazard called me "a frightening individual" today during the invasion of Wutai. Angeal told me he was actually taken aback by the ferocity I displayed in fighting. I think that had more to do with the lecture he gave me later about sword safety and maintenance than anything else. Thank Gaia he didn't assign me to more sword polishing duty. For a man obsessed with honor he sure lets his antiques tarnish.

And I met this weird little girl out in front of the dojo. She called herself something like "the single white rose of Wutai", and insisted that I let her clobber me. These Wutai mystery operatives are getting weirder by the day. Brings new life to the term "wutai flea."

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To Whom it may concern:

I must protest these so-called "vacations" you keep sending me on in Costa Del Sol. How am I supposed to take care of my gorgeous physique when I have to keep whopping nasties armed with only a beach umbrella?! I warn you, if this continues I can see a large psychiatry bill reflecting the phobia I am fast developing of men clad in denim pants with matching vests. They seem to suffer from a fashion crisis, like the Turks. And they are **everywhere! ** R+R stands for rest and recreation, not Reno and Rude. And if you're going to send a female op, could you send one that is a little less pubescent please, one that actually doesn't look dorky in a bikini?

(letter ends at this point and was clearly left unsent)

xxxx

Attacked by orange mystery blobs while on mission today. They resembled Vermicious Knids! Who is Shinra kidding? Do I look like Willy Wonka?! Strangely enough, the encounter put me right off snuggling with Angeal this afternoon. So now he laughingly insists I see the medics, to make sure my willy isn't wonky. How droll. Not.

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What **is** it with all of these wimpy cadets?! I swear that they all must have crushes on me! Sorry guys, but after that last second tricked me into doing his missions for him, I'm forced to charge you money if you wanna watch me work. Also, gotta love the language they use in order to try and impress. "Tutelage, nincompoops." It is to laugh.

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Reprimanded today. All those crushes I spoke of? They ganged up on me in the training room. Apparently I am the youngest 1st class in the history of Shinra to take down 1,000 Shinra Troops in a single training session. I never realized my fan club was so huge. I think Angeal is jealous. Apparently I have to report to his apartment tonight, where we will re-examine techniques. And he firmly stated I was **not** to bring any weapons. I'm either getting the longest lecture of my life (he's good at those), or he's finally found a replacement for sword polishing duty. Sephiroth seemed to find the whole instance rather amusing.

Later: After last night he **has** my attention! Things got interesting, Particularly after the Wutainese Lemon Squid. I don't know how Angeal does it; he's a master at worming information out of me. I need to get better than he is at knots. Score: Zack 2, Angeal 5, but only because I couldn't escape properly. Must work on not doing that. He's gorgeous when he's serious. Now I really have to work on focus!

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**Angeal**

Zack has shown vast improvement since I began showing him new techniques. He caves in too easily when his precious stuffie toys are threatened. The only problem now is that he may retaliate now that I know his secret. He's still inept at escaping wutai knots. Note to self: Be sure to introduce the puppy to five flavor noodles as a reward for extra good behavior. His focus seems to improve dramatically when learning about interrogation that way.

xxxx

Genesis grates on my nerves! I can't **believe** he talked Sephiroth into saying something to me against my house plants. Who the hell does he think he **is**? Chosen by the goddess my **ass**, if he can't handle a few simple house plants how the hell is he going to handle the planet? I got news for you, Banoran Apple Juice Boy- you're going to wake up with wutainese fleas in your ears or my name isn't Angeal Hewley. Bugs in Sephiroths **hair**. How stupid can you get?!

If this sort of idiocy continues, I just might leave Shinra.

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End file.
